Understanding Who You Are
Biologically speaking, we are born either a male or a female. Not a big idea to come to grips with. However, within that framework of being a male or a female, we develop our sexuality. This is where it gets interesting. We are all different and we are all on our own separate journey forever in a state of becoming. Through this constant state of becoming which including our sexuality, we are wanting further expansion and expression. Exploring your own sexuality and preferences is a healthy process and one to embrace.
Science has always been trying to answer the big questions for humanity and it has come a long way, however, some questions still remain a mystery. In my last blog, I talked about spanking and how I love it and yet I don’t understand why I came to love it. The depths of it are a mystery. It is my opinion that I am not alone and others are curious too. What gives, why are some of us drawn to FLR and other sexual activities that may not be the norm in society.
Understanding Society
Before we go deep into our sexual explorations, we need to understand that we all are uniquely normal and society as a whole is interested in conformity. The two ideas are not complimentary. Western society also has developed over time from aspects of puritan religions. This leads us to be sexually conservative overall in society. The Victorian age in England suppressed sexuality in a number of ways that we are still evolving from. Take it all in stride. If you are exploring your sexuality then you are just being who you are. Remember, individuals evolve much faster than society. I often look at FLR as twenty years ahead of the curve. My marriage is much better and more relaxing set up as a female led relationship.
Getting to that point in FLR took a bit of exploring my own sexuality and desires. Based on how many sex toys are sold each day, I know that I am not alone. It’s an individuals journey. Once we understand society and social norm are what they are, we can let go of trying to conform (being the Alpha male or the Beta female) and explore the deeper desires and feelings within.
Sexual Exploration Is Part Of Consciousness
In my own life as I work on myself and uncover deeper depths of my being, my curiosity about my own sexuality has grown. Some of it is linked to a submissive preference, and perhaps that is why female led relationships feels natural to me.
I recently read one thing from the book Seth Speaks by Jane Roberts. Seth talks about the different layers of our consciousness. What he said in one passage caught my attention in regards to possibly a males desire for female led relationships.
“The male yearns towards the anima (female) because it represents to the deep unconscious those other characteristics of the whole self that, on the one hand, lie latent, and that, on the other hand, struggle for release. The tension between the two leads him to temper aggressiveness with creativity, or to use aggressiveness creatively.”
Excerpt from Seth Speaks Chapter 13 by Jane Roberts
While that may seem rather deep, stay with me here. As embryos formed in humans, we all start out as female, after the initial development the embryo becomes male or stays female. I think on a deeper level males want to explore their own sexuality, and that connection to the female.
Putting It All Together
Female led relationship are sometimes touted as a male being sexually dominated by a woman. This is a common fantasy for many males, studies have proven that. I do think it goes deeper than that for some males. Being submissive provides the male a way to experience a closeness to femininity that is not possible otherwise. This desire comes from a deeper place than just pure sexual fantasy.
Empowering the female to lead and encouraging the male to serve may provide an opportunity for both sexes to gather connection to elements that create a oneness at a deeper level. I think it is time we get past the rhetoric of males just wanting to be dominated sexually and understand that female led relationships provide a lot more below the surface than has been discussed.
While it is fun and healthy to explore ones sexuality and try different things such as kink and BDSM, this exploration is also serving a greater need to connect to ones other layers of consciousness.
I leave you with one more quote from Seth, make of this what you will.
“There is also a natural tension, then, between the sexes that is based on far deeper causes than physical ones. The tension results from the nature of your consciousness that arises from the anima (female), but depends for its continuation upon the “aggressiveness” of the animus (male). I have to some extent explained the fascination that one has for the other, as resulting from the inner knowledge of the whole self, that strives to attain true identity as it struggles to combine and fulfill the seemingly opposite tendencies that are part of it.”
Excerpt from Seth Speaks Chapter 13